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Today I received my medical records today from the hospital. I had requested
all records from this year. This means I got records from an epidural steroid
injection. From the outpatient trial of the spinal cord stimulator, and then
of the surgery for the spinal cord stimulator and staying for 15 hours of
observation. They sent the requested records. With a bill for $42.57 to pay for
duplicating the records. For basically 3 visits to the hospital. Doesn't that
seem exorbitant? Also, I didn't consent to a fee before they sent me the
records-they didn't call me to tell me a price or send a notice that they
charge. I
know some places charge-but do I have to pay if I didn't know it in advance?
Anyway-I requested the records because Russ and I are concerned about what
happened in the operating room. I was awake for parts of the surgery (IV
sedation so they could awaken me when they needed me to tell them how the device
was
working). Well, I woke up one time during the surgery in such excruciating
pain I started to whimper and then cry like a baby-not scream, just cried. They
asked what was wrong and I told them. They stopped the surgery to do a
neurological test on me, afraid they had nicked something and injured me. When
the
basic exam showed nothing wrong, they decided to continue the surgery without
addressing why I was in so much pain and they didn't give me anything for the
pain through the IV. I remember hearing the surgeon say, "there's nothing we can
do right now for her, we just need to finish the surgery and get her out of
here." So I continued to cry for the rest of the surgery. No one tried to
comfort me or make me more comfortable. The pain was in my left leg/foot (they
weren't cutting there, but perhaps the positioning for 3 hours laying on that
leg
was too much-I was positioned on my side).
When the surgeon came out to talk to Russ, he admitted there were some problem
s with the surgery, but that things would be fine, and that I was fine.
I didn't know he had told Russ that, and the first thing I told Russ when he
came to the recovery area was that I had cried through the surgery (and I'm
not a crier so he knew something was really wrong).
Since I'm having continued surgical pain, which was supposed to dissipate by
the second week post-op, we wonder what really happened. Tuesday, I will be 6
weeks post op.
So-today I read my surgical report. There is NO mention of "patient in
apparent distress" or anything like that. No mention of performing a
neurological
exam in the O.R. due to concerns of surgical error. In fact, the only thing it
does mention that went wrong during the surgery was that they had some
difficulty placing the lead wires-said they had to manipulate them. Didn't say
why.
I'm guessing because my spine has a lot of fibrosis/adhesions to tunnel through
to get to the location they needed to place the electrodes in my spine.
I'm just curious-do you think the surgeon did not disclose what happened in
the O.R. in case I was injured so I wouldn't have any basis to sue?
I don't want to sue-I just want to know what happened in there-why I
cried-why he told Russ something went wrong, but then it was okay-and most
importantly-why I'm still in pain and yet this same surgeon's office made it
difficult
for me to get in to see him for post op visits-and discharged me at 3 week's
post op in a type of surgery that normally has 6-8 weeks of restrictions as well
as multiple post-op appointments with the surgeon.
Something weird.
Sign me Cynical Kathy in KY tonight

Why is that so important? Issues like abortion were not ever voted in,
there was a precedent sset by a supreme court judge that said 'ok'. Same
with school prayer
********************************
That is so true Christy, it isnt about anything but who is going to be put
in the supreme court, which is a lifetime appointment so some of those
chosen could be around for eons. I at times think that the supreme court is
where the real power is considering congress and local leaders can make all
the laws they want but it all depends on how the supreme court interpets
them. If the court deems them unconstitunal then thats that they are off
the books, or if the court thinks it means something other than what it was
intended to mean thats the final word on it.
If Bush gets in and appoints anti-murder judges then there is a good chance
Roe v Wade could be overturned becuase conservative judges would have the
majority, and if not abortion totally outlawed at the very least partial
birth murder would never hold up.
Melanie

Dorothy, I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers. Wow, 2 teeth already. Could be a very interesting child!!
Pax,
In JMJ
Angelique

Hi All, I had a follow-up with my doctor yesterday. We discussed my progress
since my
surgery in June. Everything is progressing as well as could be hoped for. My
sciatic nerve pain
is now reduced by 90% and the subcutaneous lead has helped the back pain about
40 to 50%.
Since the pain at the fusion site is not primarily nerve pain I still have pain
there but it is
reduced. He was very happy that I was able to eliminate neurontin from my daily
meds and I
told him how alert and awake I feel now. I feel like I have my brain back. He
does think I will
probably need to get the Restore rechargeable sometime in the next couple years
since I use
the stimulator so much. I am actually happy about that since I wanted it to
begin with. But the
Swedish Health system requires you to "prove" you need one by wearing the
battery out first.
I am not complaining since the operation is completely free here. So good news
all around.
A new member was asking whether to get a SCS for back pain. I would say if you
have severe
nerve pain, sciatica, I would highly recommend the SCS. If your pain is disc
pain alone I don't
think you will be as happy. My doctor here in Sweden put a lead in
subcutaneously to help
with the back pain but it is not a magic bullet. There are some new technologies
that will be
coming out in the next couple years that might eliminate the need for disc
replacement and
fusions all together. Human trials of a replacement gel that is used for
replacing the ruptured
and/or desicated discs are in the final stages. Apparently the material is
nontoxic and show
no signs of immune rejection by the body. I would wait if you can before getting
major
surgery and see what the final results are. The greatest amount of pain I still
live with is at
the fusion site. If something is available to replace fusion surgery then I
would recommend
that. Good Luck, Bernadette

I'll be posting to all in just a litle bit sis. I'm okay, though so not to worry.
Love You,
Betty
If nothing else just send this back so I know that you are alright.
Beating Heart , Big Hug Big Hug ,& 3 Kisses ,
Lynn
[LINK]

Hi all
I was really interested to read how much someone had paid for their SCS
surgery. Mine cost $40-50,000 Australian dollars (around $30-38,000
US), which is way less than what you guys are paying, and that included
one of Australia's leading neurosurgeons, a top anaesthetist together
with a whole room full of people, plus five nights at Australia's best
private hospital (choice of salmon every night). I guess we are pretty
fortunate over here and have managed to keep costs down.. I ended up
paying for nothing. Even my phone bills were paid by my insurer, as was
my accommodation and food the night before I was admitted, and my petrol
costs.
Something awful happened to me. Doctors made a huge mistake, but I am
so fortunate to be so well looked after, and I need to remember that.
If I didn't have this support, I would probably have had to outlay
$1-2,000 Australian in gap payments. In Australia, the public system
won't pay for a scs. I imagine its the same in other countries. Such
costs are prohibitive for people who can not afford insurance or who
don't have support, and I really feel for anyone who would benefit from
this surgery, as I have done, but who would never be able to find the
money to pay for it.
warm wishes
Julie

If nothing else just send this back so I know that you are alright.
Beating Heart , Big Hug Big Hug ,& 3 Kisses ,
Lynn
[LINK]

I am asking for prayers for my niece and her new baby. Adriene wasn't due
until Nov. 7, but she was out shopping on Thursday and realized that she
hadn't felt the baby move for awile and it had been really active the day
before. She decided to call her doctor and was told to go straight to the
hospital. Once there she had an ultrasound and they didn't like what they
saw. Apparantly the cord was wrapped around the babies neck and feet.
There wasn't much of a heart beat, so they induced labor after monitoring
the baby for awhile, but she only dilated 3 cm. She was told that she could
still try to have the baby naturally, but the baby was under such stress
that they adviced her to have a C-section. Adriene doesn't know how she
made the decision, but she went ahead with the C-section.
She has a girl, Rily Grace, 7 lbs and whatever oz. 19 1/2 inches long, and
ready for this, one tooth and another one ready to pop through already.
She has been in the NICU since she was born yesterday morning. She was blue
and not doing well at all at delivery. She is breathing just fine now, her
heart rate has stabilized, but she had low blood sugar and had to be on IV.
We are hoping that she will be with her mother either in her room tonight,
or in the nursery. Please pray that she remains stable and healthy. Such a
rough start in life.
My niece, Adriene is convinced though that God is trying to be really funny
giving her this baby with one tooth already who is biting Adriene already as
she is trying to nurse.
Even though she was born yesterday, I just found out tonight. Praise God
for getting Adriene to the hospital and for helping her make the right
decision about the c-section. I know he was watching out for them.
Thanks for the prayers,
hugs,
dorothy

This is the place to get all kinds of information about SCS.
My concern, when reading your note was that a doctor said that if a
Neurosurgeon did the surgery that your recovery would be about 2 weeks vs.
the 6-8. I would not take that too far. I believe Neurosurgeons are the
ones that do the surgery. I had my SCS implanted in Feb of this year. It
can take up to a year to be fully healed. Recovery times vary from person
to person. I would have to say that 6-8 is pretty accurate for a recovery
period. Reality is that this is just to start to feel better. Depending on
how much "work" they have to do, placement of the unit and how your own body
heals, all play a part in the healing time.
I have had discectomy and a fusion with hardware prior to my SCS. I was
told that the SCS is really the end of the road for me as far as my issues.
I have nerve damage that was caused from my first surgery. I am seeing my
surgeon today because he wants to discuss an intrathecal pump.
Have you been on the tame-the-pain.com website? Medtronic.com is also an
informative site. Take your time (if you can), get all the information you
can get in order to make an educated decision based on your own history. We
are all here to help in any way we can. there are great people here with
many different stories which is always helpful.
Peace and health.
Denise
_____

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!HILARIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

--
May The Lord Smile Upon You Today!! `;~)

Lena, the church organist at Coon Ridge Lutheran Church, was in her eighties and had never been married.
She was much admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. The pastor came to call on Lena one afternoon early in the spring, and she welcomed him into her Victorian parlor. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared a little tea.
As he sat facing her old pump organ, the young minister noticed a cut glass bowl sitting on top of it, filled with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom. Imagine his shock and surprise. Imagine his curiosity! Surely Miss Lena had flipped or something...!
When she returned with tea and cookies, they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him, and he could resist no longer.
"Miss Lena," he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" (pointing to the bowl).
"Oh, yes," Lena replied, "isn't it wonderful? I was walking downtown last fall and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to put it on the organ, keep it wet, and it would prevent disease. And you know... I haven't had a cold or flu all winter!"
For those of you who couldn't get a flu shot this year, you might want to give this a try
HAHAHAHAHA!!!! Love, Carrie

My back has had it I've been going to the Pain Clinic for four years.
I've had injections, Physical Therapy. Three Neorosurgeons have
recommended a Disc Replacement, or a Fusion. At this time I don't want
to do either. Now My doctor has recommended a Neurostimulator. Since
all of the restrictions that are given with the traditional one. I
have been given the option of having a Neorosurgen inplant one into my
back. He said recovery would be quicker, and I would be able to get
back on my feet sooner approx 2 weeks vs 6-8 weeks. Any input would be
appreciated as I am still unsure and scared to death...

People Are Like Teabags
Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were
meant to be there. They serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or
help you figure out who you are or who you want to become.
You never know who these people may be: roommate, neighbor, professor,
friend, lover. Even a complete stranger who, when you lock eyes with them,
you know in that very moment that they will affect your life in some
profound way.
And sometimes things happen to you, and at the time they may seem horrible,
painful, and unfair. But in reflection you realize that without overcoming
those obstacles, you would have never realized your potential, strength,
will power, or heart.
Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of
good or bad luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness, and
sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Withoutthese
small tests, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to
nowhere...safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.
The people you meet who affect your life, and the successes and downfalls
you experience, create who you are. Even the bad experiences can be learned
from. Those lessons are the hardest and probably the most important ones.
"People are like tea bags-you have to put them in hot water before you know
how strong they are."
(Author Unknown)

In a message dated 10/7/06 10:27:08 AM, purplebutterfly1@... writes:
My doctor told me he has several patients who have both the SCS and the pump.
Some even have the surgery at the same time. And one patient has *two* SCS
and one pump.
So, a combo-therapy sounds like it might be right for you.
Best wishes!
Kathy W. in KY

Lynn,

That was so funny, thank you!!!!!!! laughter is the best medicine.

Hugs Pat CA

Kathy, When I had my first stim implanted in Feb of this year I had the
generator in my stomach. It ended up being taken out March 23rd because it had
flipped as well as it becoming nacrotic from infection. (it didnt help that i
have more than a few pounds to lose. i found out from the doc that took the
whole thing out that the stomach isnt a good place to put the unit because the
circulation isnt great where there is extra tissue.) When I had my second unit
placed this August I had it placed in my lower back. I have an Advanced Bionics
stim, so far so good. Other than some yucky rib stimulation I cant complain. It
took me from March 23 rd to almost July to heal from the unit being removed, and
thats with being in the hospital for 5 days and a Wound Vac being attached to my
side night and day. Something I wouldnt wish on anybody. I guess Im saying dont
push yourself, and that maybe you should stick with your pain doc. I sure hope
your unit hasnt flipped and that everything
gets figured out and soon. JC
[willisway@...] wrote:
The saga continues :o)
Just to remind you-last week I was to have my post-op appointment on Tuesday,
and I was given the wrong information, and after driving around for an hour
and a half and calling the office-only to get voice mail-we came home. The
office called back at 6:45 p.m. and after the assistant made me feel an inch
high,
she rescheduled the appointment for today (Thursday) at 8:30 a.m. I asked her
if this was the only choice because it would take an hour drive at that time
of day to get there. It was. I confirmed the exact location for that office
visit-and wrote down the address. Russ heard me.
So, today we left at 7:20 a.m. and arrived at the Medical Arts Building at
8:15 a.m. We were greeted by someone on staff who said we were the second to
come to the wrong office today-that Dr. Mandybur was seeing patients at the Blue
Ash office. I explained this was the second time this had happened, and that I
needed to get in to that office, even though it would take a bit of a drive
since it is in Northern Cincinnati. She tried calling the office to let them
know I was coming, and got their voice mail. :-/
We arrived at the correct location and the assistant tried to blame the error
on the fact that someone from "Intake" had given me an appointment when I
called in. I reminded her that SHE had called me with the appointment
information. I said, "your name is Donna, right?" She was trying to pass the
buck. The
doctor might believe her when she explains away the mistakes, but not me!
The doctor saw me and said my incisions looked great. I told him the problems
I was having. He had never heard of someone having these problems, but said
they should improve. He said I just needed to get active and lose a few pounds
(that is stating the obvious!). So he lifted all restrictions except lifting
boxes over my head. This did not sound right to me, because I had been told
there would be 6-8 weeks of restrictions. I have already been walking as much as
possible, but was still protecting the new equipment that was installed in my
body-to keep it from migrating to the wrong spot (it takes a while for scar
tissue to adhere the device into the pocket, and to adhere the leads near the
spinal cord area).
The doc did say he has had patients who experienced the device flipping in
the pocket (by pocket I mean the slit they make inside of me where the device is
implanted in my belly). He also said he had a little old lady who had the
wires so twisted up they looked like a toy airplane with the rubberbands that
get
wrapped around and around the propellor to make it go. So, he said there is a
chance for equipment failure, and if we ever suspected that, we could take an
x-ray.
I asked if my connective tissue disease (combination of Scleroderma,
Rheumatoid Arthritis, Lupus, and Sjogren's Syndrome) could cause this reaction
to the
equipment-essentially an immune response to the foreign matter. He couldn't
discount it, but flip....

Enjoy this nice Chicago Story,
=====================
Tess was a precious eight year old when she heard her
Mom and Dad talking about her little brother, Andrew.
All she knew was that he was very sick and they were
completely out of money. They were moving to an apartment
complex next month because Daddy didn't have the money
for the doctor bills and our house. Only a very costly surgery
could save him now and it was looking like there was no-one
to loan them the money. She heard Daddy say to her tearful
Mother with whispered desperation, "Only a miracle can
save him now." Tess went to her bedroom and pulled a glass jelly jar
from its hiding place in the closet. She poured all the change out on
the floor and counted it carefully. Three times, even. The total
had to be exactly perfect. No chance here for mistakes.
Carefully placing the coins back in the jar and twisting on the
cap, she slipped out the back door and made her way 6 blocks
to Rexall's Drug Store with the big red Indian Chief sign above
the door.
She waited patiently for the pharmacist to give her some
attention but he was too intently talking to another man to be
bothered by an eight year old at this moment. Tess twisted her
feet to make a scuffing noise. Nothing. She cleared her throat
with the most disgusting sound she could muster. No good.
Finally she took a quarter from her jar and banged it on the
glass counter.
That did it!
"And what do you want?" the pharmacist asked in an
annoyed tone of voice. "I'm talking to my brother from
whom I haven't seen in ages," he said without waiting
for a reply to his question.
"Well I want to talk to you about my brother," Tess
answered back in the same annoyed tone. "He's really,
really sick and l want to buy a miracle."
"I beg your pardon?" said the pharmacist.
"His name is Andrew and he has something bad growing
inside his head and my Daddy says only a miracle can
save him now. So how much does a miracle cost?"
"We don't sell miracles here, little girl. I'm sorry
but I can't help you," the pharmacist said, softening a
little.
Listen, I have the money to pay for it. If it isn't enough,
I will get the rest. Just tell me how much it costs."
The pharmacist's brother was a well dressed man. He
stooped down and asked the little girl, "What kind of a
miracle does your brother need?"
"I don't know," Tess replied with her eyes welling up.
"I just know he's really sick and Mommy says he needs
an operation. But my Daddy can't pay for it, so I want to
use my money.
"How much do you have?" asked the man from Chicago.
"One dollar and eleven cents," Tess answered barely
audibly. "And it's all the money I have, but I can get
some more if I need to.
"Well, what a coincidence," smiled the man. "A dollar
and eleven cents--the exact price of a miracle for
little brothers." He took her money in one hand
and with the other hand he grasped her mitten and said
"Take me to where you live. I want to see your brother
and meet your parents. Let's see if I have the kind of miracle
you need."
That well dressed man was Dr. Carlton Armstrong, a
surgeon, specializing in neuro-surgery. The operation was
completed without charge and wasn't long until Andrew
was home again and doing well. Mom and Dad were
happily talking about the chain of events that had led them to
this place. "That surgery," her Mom whispered. "was a real miracle.
I wonder how much it would have cost?" Tess smiled.
She knew exactly how much a miracle cost... one dollar and
eleven cents ...... plus the faith of a little child.
A miracle is not the suspension of natural law, but
the operation of a higher law .....

Ruth-keep hanging in there until they get your settings just right. And even
then, they will need tweaked every so often as your body gets used to the
programming. And don't feel bad about asking them to help-the unit costs so
much,
they are paid WELL to help you out.
Also-don't be competitive with what you think your settings should be as far
as the strength. Every person is different, and my rep told that as long as it
is on, even if you don't feel the tingling sensation there is SOME benefit.
She told me I didn't have to have it so high all the time-I can reduce the
setting when it gets to be too much, or when I want a break from it-but keep it
on
to do SOME good. Then turn it off all together when you just don't want it
on. The power is in your hands.
Keep us posted!
Kathy W. in KY
(3 weeks post op)

Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID number?

Customer: Hi, I'd like to place an order.

Operator: I must have your NIDN first sir.

Customer: My national ID number... yeah, hold on... eh... it's 02049998-45-54610.

Operator: Thank you Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number is 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number is 266-2566. Email address is sheehan@.... Which number are you calling from sir?

Customer: Huh? I'm at home. Where'd you get all this information?

Operator: We're wired into the HSS, sir.

Customer: The HSS, what is that?

Operator: We're wired into the Homeland Security System sir. This will add only 15 seconds to your ordering time.

Customer: (sighs) Oh well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas.

Operator: I don't think that's a good idea, sir.

Customer: Whaddaya mean?

Operator: Sir, your medical records and commode sensors indicate that you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health Care Provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice.

Customer: What?!?!?! What do you recommend then?

Operator: You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it.

Customer: What makes you think I'd like something like that?

Operator: Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week. That's why I made the suggestion.

Customer: All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones then.

Operator: That should be plenty for you, your wife, and your four kids. Your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49.99.

Customer: Lemme give you my credit card number.

Operator: I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your credit balance is over the limit.

Customer: I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver gets here.

Operator: That won't work either sir. Your checking account is overdrawn as well.

Customer: Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. How long will it take?

Operator: We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes sir. If you're in a hurry, you might want to pick them up while you're out getting the cash; but then, carrying two pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward.

Customer: Wait! How do you know I ride a motorcycle?

Operator: It says here that you're behind on your car payments, so your car got repo'ed. But, your Harley's paid for and you just filled your tank yesterday.

Customer: Well, I'll be a @&%$#@&?@%!

Operator: I'd advise watching your language sir. You've already got a July 4, 2005 conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see here in September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at the judge. Oh yes, I see here that you just got out from a 90 day stay at the County Correctional Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return to society?

Customer: (speechless)

Operator: Will there be anything else sir?

Customer: Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke.

Operator: I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits this. Thank you for calling Pizza Hut.

Dorothy: Such WONDERFUL stories you have provided...... I have LOVED them all!!!!!!!!!

Cookie

Exercise Daily - Walk with the Lord

Funny! Too True!

--
May The Lord Smile Upon You Today!! `;~)

Subject: Apples & Wine
Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree.
Most men don't want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of
falling and getting hurt. Instead, they sometimes take the apples from the
ground that aren't as good, but easy. The apples at the top think something
is wrong with them, when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait
for the right man to come along, the one who is brave enough to climb all
the way to the top of the tree.
Now Men.... Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and it's
up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into something
acceptable to have dinner with.
Share this with all the good apples you know.

Well, I think I received all the bills for my most spinal cord stimulator
surgery. It's a doozey! I have bills from the surgeon, the anesthesiologist and
the hospital. I think that should be it. You won't believe this. Keep in mind
this was a 3 hour surgery, without general anesthesia, and a 15 hour
observation period (not considered admitted this way, to save money, but it was
overnight).
The bills came to: $72,904.71
My insurance wrote off a great deal of it (a special contract between Humana
and these providers). Then, insurance paid $14,623.43.
My cost? $4,420.98
That's really good considering, but much more than we expected. They only
covered some charges at 75%, and there was no ceiling on what we pay per year
(or
if there is, it must be fairly high). We were not told that the hospital was
considered out of network, but it was the only one my surgeon operates at, and
he is IN network (they paid his bill at 100%). I assumed since it was all
pre-certified that it meant I had full coverage except for deductibles and
copays, but I was wrong. That's a bummer! But when you see the initial bill over
$72,000, I am still very grateful to only have to pay $4,420.98! We will call
this week to set up payments.
We also owe the Emergency Room a lot for the trip Russ and I both made there
the week before my surgery. It looks like that will be another $1200 or so.
I know many many people have extremely high medical bills, so I am forever
grateful for this bill, all things considered. But it sure is a very expensive
procedure for just a one day event. Most folks I know with higher hospital
bills are because of several days in an ICU type setting with all sorts of
special
equipment. I wasn't even intubated during the surgery!
So, I guess this is the good news/bad news all wrapped into one! As the
commercial goes, if this procedure does the trick, this will be....PRICELESS.
Kathy W. in KY

"I wish for you..."
Comfort on difficult days,
Smiles when sadness intrudes,
Rainbows to follow the clouds,
Laughter to kiss your lips,
Sunsets to warm your heart,
Gentle hugs when spirits sag,
Friendships to brighten your being,
Beauty for your eyes to see,
Confidence for when you doubt,
Faith so that you can believe,
Courage to know yourself,
Patience to accept the truth,
And love to complete your life.

Hi Group
I am looking for more information about an intrathecal pump. I have had a
SCS since Feb of this year. My doctor recently had me try Topamax (instead
of Neurontin) to which I couldn't take. As my previous postings stated, I
had severe pain in my mouth as well as swelling and bruising of my gums. I
had also had my Amitriptyline increased. I stopped the Topamax first and
the pain gradually went away. Then I had stopped the Amitriptyline and
slowly my gums are getting better. My surgeon suggested us discussing the
possibility of me receiving an intrathecal pump. I had heard of it, but I
don't know all that much about it. I did look on the Medtronic's site for
some information. A personal experience is also a great source of
information.
I have nerve damage caused from my first back surgery (a discectomy). My
left foot is always tingling and often times is numb. My SCS has been
helpful, but only about 25% improvement with no residual relief when off.
Does anyone have a SCS and a pump or will they take the SCS out? Any
information will be most helpful (good and bad).
I have an appointment on Tuesday to discuss this.
I hope everyone is doing well.
Thanks,
Denise (Massachusetts)

Operator: Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your national ID number?

Customer: Hi, I'd like to place an order.

Operator: I must have your NIDN first sir.

Customer: My national ID number... yeah, hold on... eh... it's 02049998-45-54610.

Operator: Thank you Mr. Sheehan. I see you live at 1742 Meadowland Drive, and the phone number is 494-2366. Your office number over at Lincoln Insurance is 745-2302 and your cell number is 266-2566. Email address is sheehan@.... Which number are you calling from sir?

Customer: Huh? I'm at home. Where'd you get all this information?

Operator: We're wired into the HSS, sir.

Customer: The HSS, what is that?

Operator: We're wired into the Homeland Security System sir. This will add only 15 seconds to your ordering time.

Customer: (sighs) Oh well, I'd like to order a couple of your All-Meat Special pizzas.

Operator: I don't think that's a good idea, sir.

Customer: Whaddaya mean?

Operator: Sir, your medical records and commode sensors indicate that you've got very high blood pressure and extremely high cholesterol. Your National Health Care Provider won't allow such an unhealthy choice.

Customer: What?!?!?! What do you recommend then?

Operator: You might try our low-fat Soybean Pizza. I'm sure you'll like it.

Customer: What makes you think I'd like something like that?

Operator: Well, you checked out 'Gourmet Soybean Recipes' from your local library last week. That's why I made the suggestion.

Customer: All right, all right. Give me two family-sized ones then.

Operator: That should be plenty for you, your wife, and your four kids. Your 2 dogs can finish the crusts, sir. Your total is $49.99.

Customer: Lemme give you my credit card number.

Operator: I'm sorry sir, but I'm afraid you'll have to pay in cash. Your credit balance is over the limit.

Customer: I'll run over to the ATM and get some cash before your driver gets here.

Operator: That won't work either sir. Your checking account is overdrawn as well.

Customer: Never mind! Just send the pizzas. I'll have the cash ready. How long will it take?

Operator: We're running a little behind, sir. It'll be about 45 minutes sir. If you're in a hurry, you might want to pick them up while you're out getting the cash; but then, carrying two pizzas on a motorcycle can be a little awkward.

Customer: Wait! How do you know I ride a motorcycle?

Operator: It says here that you're behind on your car payments, so your car got repo'ed. But, your Harley's paid for and you just filled your tank yesterday.

Customer: Well, I'll be a @&%$#@&?@%!

Operator: I'd advise watching your language sir. You've already got a July 4, 2005 conviction for cussing out a cop and another one I see here in September for contempt at your hearing for cussing at the judge. Oh yes, I see here that you just got out from a 90 day stay at the County Correctional Facility. Is this your first pizza since your return to society?

Customer: (speechless)

Operator: Will there be anything else sir?

Customer: Yes, I have a coupon for a free 2 liter of Coke.

Operator: I'm sorry sir, but our ad's exclusionary clause prevents us from offering free soda to diabetics. The New Constitution prohibits this. Thank you for calling Pizza Hut.

THE 7-UPS
1. Wake Up - Decide to have a good day.
"Today is the day the Lord hath made; let us rejoice &
be glad in it" Psalms 118:24
2. Dress Up - The best way to dress up is to put on a
smile. A smile is an inexpensive way to improve your
looks.
"The Lord does not look at the things man looks at.
Man looks at outward appearance but the Lord looks at
the heart" I Sam 16:7
3. Shut Up - Say nice things & learn to listen. God
gave us 2 ears and 1 mouth so He must have meant for
us to do twice as much listening as talking.
"He who guards his lips guards his soul" Proverbs
13:3
"Gossip betrays confidence avoid men who talk too
much" Proverbs 20:19
"Listen to advice, accept instruction and in the end,
you will be wise" Proverbs 19:20
4. Stand Up - For what you believe in. Stand for
something or you will fall for anything.
"Let us not be weary in doing good; for at the proper
time, we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.
Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good..."
Galatians 6:9-10
5. Look Up - To the Lord.
"I can do everything through Him who gives me
strength" Philippians 4:13
6. Reach Up - For something higher.
"...press toward the mark for the prize of the high
calling of God in Christ Jesus." Philippians 3:14
7. Lift Up - Your Prayers.
"Do not worry about anything; instead PRAY ABOUT
EVERYTHING" Philippians 4:6
These bits of wisdom were shared with me today and I
thought I would share them with everyone I love and
who loves God. So have a blessed day and remember the
7-ups of life.
~ Author Unknown

The saga continues :o)
Just to remind you-last week I was to have my post-op appointment on Tuesday,
and I was given the wrong information, and after driving around for an hour
and a half and calling the office-only to get voice mail-we came home. The
office called back at 6:45 p.m. and after the assistant made me feel an inch
high,
she rescheduled the appointment for today (Thursday) at 8:30 a.m. I asked her
if this was the only choice because it would take an hour drive at that time
of day to get there. It was. I confirmed the exact location for that office
visit-and wrote down the address. Russ heard me.
So, today we left at 7:20 a.m. and arrived at the Medical Arts Building at
8:15 a.m. We were greeted by someone on staff who said we were the second to
come to the wrong office today-that Dr. Mandybur was seeing patients at the Blue
Ash office. I explained this was the second time this had happened, and that I
needed to get in to that office, even though it would take a bit of a drive
since it is in Northern Cincinnati. She tried calling the office to let them
know I was coming, and got their voice mail. :-/
We arrived at the correct location and the assistant tried to blame the error
on the fact that someone from "Intake" had given me an appointment when I
called in. I reminded her that SHE had called me with the appointment
information. I said, "your name is Donna, right?" She was trying to pass the
buck. The
doctor might believe her when she explains away the mistakes, but not me!
The doctor saw me and said my incisions looked great. I told him the problems
I was having. He had never heard of someone having these problems, but said
they should improve. He said I just needed to get active and lose a few pounds
(that is stating the obvious!). So he lifted all restrictions except lifting
boxes over my head. This did not sound right to me, because I had been told
there would be 6-8 weeks of restrictions. I have already been walking as much as
possible, but was still protecting the new equipment that was installed in my
body-to keep it from migrating to the wrong spot (it takes a while for scar
tissue to adhere the device into the pocket, and to adhere the leads near the
spinal cord area).
The doc did say he has had patients who experienced the device flipping in
the pocket (by pocket I mean the slit they make inside of me where the device is
implanted in my belly). He also said he had a little old lady who had the
wires so twisted up they looked like a toy airplane with the rubberbands that
get
wrapped around and around the propellor to make it go. So, he said there is a
chance for equipment failure, and if we ever suspected that, we could take an
x-ray.
I asked if my connective tissue disease (combination of Scleroderma,
Rheumatoid Arthritis, Lupus, and Sjogren's Syndrome) could cause this reaction
to the
equipment-essentially an immune response to the foreign matter. He couldn't
discount it, but flip flopped the conversation back to the positive-that the
spinal cord stimulator was doing what it was supposed to do, and now I just
needed to get back into life and enjoy it.
I'm all ready to be enjoying life, but I am still having a pain level of 7
out of 10 in the area where the surgery took place, so I don't think things are
quite back to normal yet!
My Medtronics rep (the company who made the equipment) called as soon as we
walked in the door to see how things went with the doctor. I explained what he
had said. She said she is not allowed to disagree with a doctor, but she can
tell me that it is Medtronics policy, and also the policy of most physicians,
to have 6-8 weeks of restrictions, and I could choose what I thought was best
for my body. It's only been 3 weeks and 2 days since surgery. She also felt
that since I was still having significant symptoms in the area of the surgical
site that I still have a lot of healing to do. She reiterated that she had never
seen a patient like me that had the type of tightness where the extension is
between the leads in the back and the device in the belly. She also thought
the burning I have in the pocket where the device is is not normal. Especially
since it worsens when I have the external device hooked up to it to recharge
the battery. She is hoping it is due to swelling that will get better as I heal.
So, good news:
-Incisions look good.
-Device is working well to relieve pain to lower extremities and somewhat in
the lower back.
-Device is now charging, albeit slowly.
And not so good news:
-The tightness and bulging is still present along my flank and there is
burning in the pocket where the device is.
-I have to choose between not having restrictions, which would be more fun,
or having restrictions the 6-8 weeks, which would be more prudent. My gut says
to continue with the restrictions, since I still have symptoms.
The Medtronics rep said 80% of post-op complications comes from lead
migration-meaning the wires have moved from where they should be in the back.
So, that
is why they recommend 6-8 weeks of restrictions. Since Russ's cousin had this
"lead migration" happen to him, I tend to want to be extra-cautious.
So-that is where things stand. I will do any more of my surgical follow-up
with my pain doctor. He's the one I started with, and the one who referred me
for this surgery. His office is more amenable and I know I will work better with
his office. The Medtronics rep is agreeable with this plan.
The surgeon's office today didn't schedule any more visits with the
neurosurgeon anyway-just sort of letting me walk out. Weird...
We're done with them!
So-that's what I know. Your continued prayers are much appreciated!
Kathy
====
Kathy Carlton Willis
Living Out Loud Communications & Manuscript Editorial Services
WillisWay@...

Just want to say Good luck with everything Kathy. I hope things go
better for you soon. I know for me with the scs it was very
difficult from the beginning. I had a lot of issue also. Still have
some but they did get better over time and with adjustment. My
electrodes do funny things too. They stimulate places that shouldn't
be stimulated by that particular electrode. I have spent 2 hours at
a time with my rep and she still has not gotten things worked out
just right. I've been with them 3 or 4 times now. I do believe that
eventually it will work out.
TAke care and I'm saying my prayers for you,
Ruth

The Master called my name one day because he needed someone to
go:
I said " Lord, in my spare time, between school, spending time
with my husband, working from 8 to 6, and trying to coordinate a program
for my community to help our children do better, I will help you look".
"See, I know I can't go right now cause I have so much to do."
He said, "well where shall I find such a person? I thought I saw
your name on my list of available people."
"Well Lord, that was the prayer that I prayed last year, but
since then, things have changed."
He said "like what?"
"Well I'm working on my Ph.D. and I'm needed by so many people
and my husband is always wanting something done, and on top of that my
community EXPECTS me to help and give to them so..."
"Well, seeing that you're busy, I'll let you go, but we will
talk again, if YOU have some time."
I went on through the days, and the weeks, and the months
completing my task as always. One evening, while studying for
my comp exams, I received a call from the hospital concerning
my husband. He had been in a terrible accident and was in critical
condition. I dropped everything and ran to the Hospital where I
found my husband hanging on for dear life. I immediately begin
to pray "Lord, don't take him now, I can't bare it" but my prayer
echoed off the wall and returned into my own ear. That next morning I left
the hospital tired and weary, and walked in the door of my classroom just in
time to begin my comps. As the professors begin asking me questions I
opened my mouth to speak but nothing came out. In my mind, I began
praying, praying hard, but my prayer echoed again and I found myself
upset at God because he was nowhere to be found. I could not explain
to them what was happening.
After leaving from my exams, I called in to work because I was
so distraught at all that was going on. I explained to my supervisor what
had
happened and she demanded that I take some time off. After visiting my
husband in the hospital that evening, I went home and fell into a sunken
state
crying and despairing. Just then I heard someone calling my name.
"Lord, is that YOU?"
"Well yes it is. Do YOU have some time? I wanted to see if I
could just talk ..... "
Instead of waiting to hear his questions, I lashed out in anger
and resentment. "How is it that when I needed you today, YOU
couldn't be found and last night I cried and cried but all I heard were
echoes
from the walls. My husband is dying, I'm flunking out of school, I may not
have
a job and you can just sit and say YOU want to talk".
The Lord interrupted me in my foolish speaking. "My child, I was
busy, out looking for someone to go and tell others about me when you
cried. By the time I came to answer you had moved on to something else. So,
I
decided to let your husband rest, and keep you home for a few days that way
MAYBE you would get in touch with me, if YOU had some time. For you see,
before your husband, the community or your job needs you, I NEED YOU. And if
all these things take you away from me, I have to almost take them away
from YOU, in order to get a moment. "
I calmed down and began to cry. For I remembered my prayer of
wanting to go and do for the Lord.
He said "I just wanted to recheck with you to see if you knew of
ANYONE that I could send to be a witness for me and tell others about me...
anyone at all....?"
With tears in my eyes and feeling so unworthy I said "Lord, send
me, I'll go."
God should never have to ask us if we have some time. When he
died on the cross he put aside everything to insure us eternal life. We
should be more than GRATEFUL to do service for the Lord, to witness, and to
tell ANYONE we can about Jesus. Don't let your "things", WHATEVER they may
be,
get you so tied up that God has to become a meeting time in your yearly
planner.
He had more than enough time for us. The least we could do is have time
for him.

Three Trees
Once there were three trees on a hill in the woods.
They were discussing their hopes and dreams when the
first tree said, "Someday I hope to be a treasure
chest. I could be filled with gold, silver and
precious gems. I could be decorated with intricate
carving and everyone would see the beauty."
Then the second tree said, "Someday I will be a mighty
ship. I will take kings and queens across the waters
and sail to the corners of the world. Everyone will
feel safe in me because of the strength of my hull."
Finally the third tree said, "I want to grow to be the
tallest and straightest tree in the forest. People
will see me on top of the hill and look up to my
branches, and think of the heavens and God and how
close to them I am reaching. I will be the greatest
tree of all time and people will always remember me."
After a few years of praying that their dreams would
come true, a group of woodsmen came upon the trees.
When one came to the first tree he said, "This looks
like a strong tree, I think I should be able to sell
the wood to a carpenter" ...and he began cutting it
down. The tree was happy, because he knew that the
carpenter would make him into a treasure chest.
At the second tree a woodsman said, "This looks like a
strong tree, I should be able to sell it to the
shipyard." The second tree was happy because he knew
he was on his way to becoming a mighty ship.
When the woodsmen came upon the third tree, the tree
was frightened because he knew that if they cut him
down his dreams would not come true. One of the
woodsmen said, "I don't need anything special from my
tree so I'll take this one", and he cut it down.
When the first tree arrived at the carpenters, he was
made into a feed Box for animals. He was then placed
in a barn and filled with hay. This was not at all
what he had prayed for. The second tree was cut and
Made into a small fishing boat. His dreams of being
a mighty ship and carrying kings had come to an end.
The third tree was cut into large pieces and left
alone in the dark.
The years went by, and the trees forgot about their
dreams. Then one day, a man and woman came to the
barn. She gave birth and they placed the baby in the
hay in the feed box that was made from the first tree.
The man wished that he could have made a crib for the
baby, but this manger would have to do. The tree could
feel the importance of this event and knew that it had
held the greatest treasure of all time.
Years later, a group of men got in the fishing boat
made from the second tree. One of them was tired and
went to sleep. While they were out on the water, a
great storm arose and the tree didn't think it was
strong enough to keep the men safe. The men woke the
sleeping man, and he stood and said "Peace" and the
storm stopped. At this time, the tree knew that it
had carried the King of Kings in its boat.
Finally, someone came and got the third tree. It was
carried through the streets as the people mocked the
man who was carrying it. When they came to a stop, the
man was nailed to the tree and raised in the air to
die at the top of a hill. When Sunday came, the tree
came to realize that it was strong enough to stand at
the top of the hill and be as close to God as was
possible, because Jesus had been crucified on it.
The moral of this story is that when things don't seem
to be going your way, always know that God has a plan
for you. If you place your trust in Him, He will give
you great gifts. Each of the trees got what they
wanted, just not in the way they had imagined. We
don't always know what God's plans are for us. We just
know that His ways are not our ways, but His ways are
always best.
Keep it moving...pass it on, so it could inspire more
people on His way.
Author Unknown

Carrie,

I use snopes all of the time, as a matter of fact I copied a hoax page and sent it to a friend just today.
Beating Heart , Big Hug Big Hug ,& 3 Kisses ,
Lynn
[LINK]

Melanie
first of all let me thank you for the lovely words of encouragement regarding
our household. What an excellent idea!
This election is extremely important! Besides that it may be closest race in
history this president will be appointing 4 or 5 new Suoremem Court judges. Why
is that so important? Issues like abortion were not ever voted in, there was a
precedent sset by a supreme court judge that said 'ok'. Same with school
prayer. It was not voted out, but a supremem court judge said..no parying in
schools anymore. Please get out there an vote ! (for Bush!!!!!!!!) :-)
--- "Melanie" <mammabear@...
==
agape,
Christy
Proverbs 31:13 She seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands.
AIM user name: crochetin4Christ
MSN user name: ouchiemama
http://www.egroups.com/group/ThankYouJesusforThornsonMyRoses (elist for
Christian women living with chronic pain and illness
http://www.geocities.com/christybritain/
Christian pages, Matthew 25:40 Ministries,free craft and crochet patterns, FMS,
classic movies,recipes,homeschooling, aromatherapy, books, mysteries, etc. etc.
http://www.geocities.com/britainchristianacademy/indexofstudies.html (thematic
on-line unit studies with off-line activites and games grades 2-?)
websites are continual works in progress

Hi all,
Well, I took a shot at turning the unit off again to see if it would
affect the pain in my side and abdomen. I know I said I had done this
before and the pain was still there. But someone in here said it again
and I figured "what the heck, lets see what happens." Sooooo, I did.
I forgot that I had turned it off several hours later and wondered why
I was in so much pain for one thing and the other was that the pain in
my side/abdom. was not there!!! In the beginning it must have been
agravating the gall bladder surgery site and then just kept doing it.
Anyway, Yeahhhhhhhh, now the thing was to get it tweaked to stop it
from doing that. I had an appt. with the rep last week and she spent 2
hours trying to figure out why it was doing that. The best she can
figure is that one or more of the electrodes is stimulating a nerve
root to that area and making it hurt. I also have 3 or 4 electrodes on
the right that cannot be turned on bec. they cause pain and 5 on the
left side. I get much more stimulation from them then is usual. Now
at least I can turn it up and get the stim up into my low back and
ribs. She also changed the rate, which I don't like and will have her
change again, but at least I'm able to get more pain relief than before.
I still cannot tolerate it on as high as I need it yet. I don't like
the feeling of it at all. So I'm increasing it little by little so
that I can get used to it over time.
That's it for now-whewwwwww. Thanks everyone for listening a caring.
You guys are great.
hugs,
Ruth

Good thing to know!

--
May The Lord Smile Upon You Today!! `;~)

Subject: Emailing: irs
Date: Tue, 27 Dec 2005 15:19:06 +0000

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#1-Have any of you been told that they got the extension that connects the
leads with the device too SHORT? If so-what did they do about it? Or perhaps
they told you it went too deep into the soft tissue. Whatever the problem-if you
have had problems with the catheter connecting the device to the leads, will
you please write me about your experience?
#2-Have you been told that your device is implanted too deeply? OR, have you
had a hard time getting a good signal to recharge your device (mine is the
latest Medtronics Restore)? Please write and tell me about any problems
associated with the device or the pocket for the device, and what was done to
help.
Thanks so much for your help. I go to the surgeon on Thursday, and we will be
discussing these issues. I am almost 3 weeks post-op.
Kathy W. in KY

I Like this one!

--
May The Lord Smile Upon You Today!! `;~)

Class is an aura of confidence that is being sure without being cocky. Class
has nothing to do with money. Class never runs scared.
It is self-discipline and self-knowledge. It's the sure footedness that
comes with having proved you can meet life.
-- Ann Landers, born 1918

I have felt for many weeks now this same calling, that this is a more
important election than most even realize. Please lets pray on this matter
and if you feel called as I do pray unceasingly for this election and our
country. I dont know why but the Lord has put this on my heart as well, we
are at a crossroads in the US and we need a man open to Gods will if things
are to get better.
Melanie
PRAYER ALERT FOR THIS NATION
By Pastor Dutch Sheets
================================
During our Wednesday night service on October 4, 2000, the Holy Spirit
moved upon me with the greatest prayer burden I have ever experienced. It
would be impossible for me to exaggerate the depth of the prayer burden I
was given. This time of intense, overwhelming travail for our nation
lasted for three and a half hours. During that time, I wept off and on
harder than I even knew was possible.
The Lord began to speak to my heart about the upcoming presidential
election, which is the most critical in decades. There must be a turning
in this nation toward righteousness, and this will only happen if God's
man is elected into office. It is not so much that this man is now ready
spiritually to take the nation where God wants, but
rather that he has a heart upon which God can effectively move. I believe
that if the election was held now, God s purposes would not be
established. (I am not basing this on polls or debates, but solely on
what the Lord revealed to me that night.) In fact, the results would be
such that His purposes for this nation would be set back for many, many
years, possibly decades.
During this intense time on Wednesday night, God led me to Daniel 10 where
the account is given of great warfare in the heavenlies between the forces
of darkness and light. He showed me that the outcome of the current
battle regarding this election will be determined by the prayer of the
Church. If there is enough prayer and fasting, God's
person will be elected, righteousness will prevail and God's plan will be
established. If there is not enough prayer, God's person will lose the
election and the turning of this nation will be drastically delayed.
I realize that what I am about to say could sound presumptuous, but I
believe God witnessed to my heart that one of the greatest prayer efforts
in the history of our nation must be mobilized immediately. The amount of
prayer that would normally be done for the election is absolutely not
enough. I have never before attempted something such
as this, but after seeking confirmation from trusted national leaders in
the body of Christ, I believe the Holy Spirit earnestly desires that I
issue an alert regarding the seriousness of this hour.
I am asking for those who feel this warning is from the Lord to intensify
their prayer efforts by doing several things:
- Incorporate significant amounts of prayer into church services.
Perhaps turn some entire services...into times of intercession for this
purpose. If not entire services, at least give major blocks of time to
prayer.
- Additional prayer meetings, both day and evening, be orchestrated for
this purpose.
- A national fast be held during the last 21 days before election day.
(This would begin October 17th and continue through November 6th.)
- Prayer meetings on each of these 21 nights are needed.
Daniel 2:21 states: He changes the times and the seasons, He removes
kings and sets up kings, He gives wisdom to the wise and knowledge to
those who have understanding. This can and must happen. It will be
realized, however, only if we heed this imperative call to intensified,
fervent prayer.
If you agree with the urgency of this message, please pass it on to your
contacts and ask them to do the same. Let us unite in this cause and see
God turn our nation back to Him.
Sincerely in Christ,
Dutch

Kathy-
I hope you get things figured out and start to feel better. You are in our
thoughts and prayers!
Peace,
Denise
_____

well since I have carpel tunnel and tendinitis in both wrists and cant
continue my christmas crocheting i have some time to respond for once.
christy,
i want you and your husband and whatever other prayer friends you can get to
go through your home room to room and pray over your family and home and
cast satan out in the name of jesus christ, pardon the no capitol letters
but its difficult to type with braces on, and ask the lord to place angel in
every corner of your home for protection. it may sound weird but i did it
in our first home because my spiritual gift is discernment of spirit and i
knew that something was wrong and my children were having horrible
nightmares and i was as well, once we did that they stopped. i am not saying
that your problems will necessarily disappear if you do this but it will put
the protection of the lord in every nook and cranny of your home which you
all need right now.
stay strong and know that your human so dont beat up on yourself if you lose
it sometimes, you showed great self constraint by having the presence of
mind to pray that you didnt hurt the child when a lot of people would have
gone off on him. your doing the lords work here loving children that others
wouldnt want to so remember the lord is walking this difficult path with you
melanie

Carrie,

What a small world! I am, just now, getting around to open all of my e-mail, and I just received thesame site frim my sister in law in Wisconsin.

Thank you, it is just as beautiful the second time as the first.
Beating Heart , Big Hug Big Hug ,& 3 Kisses ,
Lynn
[LINK]

Update:
Today I saw the medtronics representative (the company that makes my spinal
cord stimulator). I didn't get their R.N. because she was caught in traffic in
Dayton, but I did get one of the other reps. She met with me at one of the
Mayfield Spine Institute branches. We also finally got a call in to have the
office prescribe some more pain meds until I see the surgeon.
#1-She examined the incisions and thought they looked good. I showed her the
tightness between the two incisions, where the wires are fished underneath the
skin and soft tissue-and she agreed that it felt much tighter than it should
be. She acknowledged that this would cause muscle pain. She is going to
research what size extension they used between the device in my belly and the
lead
wires in my back. She is curious if they cut it too short, or if it is possible
that it burrowed deeper than it should have or gotten twisted somewhere.
She's not really sure what the problem is, but she does acknowledge that it
could
be a problem. We are to talk it over when we have the appointment with my
surgeon next Thursday.
#2-She reset the programs. We found several that will work well. At least 6
for now. And I can use them individually, or in tandem with up to 2 other
programs at a time. She said she isn't sure why, but my system is backwards from
most. They connected my lead wires in such a way, that what is normally sending
signals to the right side is sending it to the left, and vica versa. Took her
twice as long to figure out programs that would work because of it. She isn't
sure, again, if the wires got twisted, or if the doctor came at it from a
different perspective (perhaps going from the top down rather than from the
bottom
up, which would make the leads on the opposite side). And she's not sure why
they would decide to do something different. So again-something to look into.
I do like the new settings!
#3-She taught us how to recharge the unit. We ran into a big problem here.
She said it normally takes 2-3 tries to position the magnet over the device that
is under the belly to get a good signal to recharge it. There are 8 bars on
the device to show the signal, and you want at least a 5 or more (much like a
cell phone). The most she could get with me was 4 bars, but she couldn't hold
it there-it kept going back down to 0 bars. She said the device showed it was
still charging, but it would take MUCH longer at that rate, than if I had the
better signal. I'm wondering if the same body chemistry that causes me to stop
watches could be what caused the problem. She fussed with it for a long time
to try to get a signal, and to be honest, I finally had to tell her I was too
tender for her to be pushing around on my belly to try to find a good signal.
We were with her for over an hour and a half.
#4-The Medtronics gal also said if we couldn't get something figured out, we
could do x-rays to see if the device is where it should be. She said it could
have flipped front to back, or gone too deep into the tissue. We could also
use x-ray if we have to to check why my side is so tight where the wires connect
from front to back. She is thinking they used too tight of a cord-sort of
like having a belt a smaller size than your pant size-it would be too tight on
you-and that is how it feels across my flank-and you can feel it on the outside
with your hand, as well as see it.
I'm wondering, since I was born with some things different with me, if that
is why my signals are flip-flopped right and left and even in location of level
on the right or left side. You could tell when she programmed things in-she
wouldn't tell me where I would sense the vibration, and often I would tell her
a different location than she expected. I know everyone is "wired" a little
differently...but...
I just hope that I can get a good charge on the device so that I'm not
"hooked up" very often. Russ is thinking-if he gets the recharger fully charged
and
then connects it to me, it might do better than the one just out of the case.
The rep does these all the time though, so who knows?
So-that is where things stand. A lot to pray about! And your prayers mean
SOOOO much to me!
Gratefully,
Kathy
++++
Kathy Carlton Willis
Living Out Loud Communications & Manuscript Editorial Services
WillisWay@...

hi
I sent the last devotional from rest ministries..as timley as ever it was!
I have a prayer request.....please pray for me. As you know, most of you
anyway, I have 2 sons whom we just adopted and both have ADHD and emotional
problems...I want to say especially my youngest, but perhaps that isn't fair.
He handles it differently. He is very sensitive and emotional and self-..what
is the word? He turns everything against himself. He has self-mutilated in the
past..both boys throw very scarey fits of rage and pre-verbal communication
anger where the actually regress into the pre-verbal stage..from when they were
babies. A long history to get the prayer request, but I think it helps me to
talk aobut it.
I have never hit a child in my life. I have never wanted to hit a child. I
didn't even believe in spanking most of the time. (I have a 10 yr old daughter)
Since the adoption finalized on Sept. 18th, our lives have become a nightmare!
They threw fits and rages before.....put holes in the walls with their heads
(oldest)...scratched themselves 'til they bled, hit themselves..and both have
lashed out at us physically as well. Twice last week we had HUGE blowouts while
Rob was at work. (They have a lot of anger towards 'mother-figure'..not
necessarily me personally but what I represent or who I represent I guess I
should say.) They have little respect for me during these fits because they are
not afraid of me. They are afraid of Rob...but they have lashed out him also in
the past.
Today, the youngest threw a violent fit. 3 times he went for the knives..after
I stopped him from scratching himself and hitting himself...hew swore at me, he
called me names, he picked up a solid oak dining room chair and tried to hit me
with it...he kicked at me and swung at me, defied me, spit on the floor, spit at
me....so, as I have had to do the past few times I have wrestled him to the
floor and sat on him. My #1 priority is to keep us both safe. Well, the past
few times I have wanted to hit him and have even grabbed his ear to make him
come with me (I tell him to sit down and he walks away....I tell him to sit
still and he rolls or scoots all over the room....) I was literally oraying out
loud for God to grant me patience and wisdom (actually I think the words were
"Dear Lord, please keep me from killing him".) I am at such a los. We had
decided that I would not try to enforce disciplinaary action, Rob would do it
when he comes home. Things had been going pretty well for a few days so I
wasn't on guard for this battle. I sat on him, straddling him and hunched over
with a firm grip on his wrists for over half an hour. At least he was honest
when I asked if I could trust him and let go and he's say no and then try to hit
me or himself again.
By the time Rob got home from work, I had been in the same position for over
half an hour. Now, remember, I have FMS severely...I am stiff and sore and in
constant pain especially in my arms, hips, and legs. Rob had to pick me up
because I could not feel from my waist down and had excrutiating pain in my
lower back area. My hands were stuck in a grasp position and I could not
straighten out my back and shoulders. Rob gave me a percocet and put me in my
chair the best he could...
while he was moving me the first time, apparantly my left ankle got bent the
wrong way. It took a good 15 minutes before I had any feeling in my legs and
feet, and my feet turned from purple back to pink. The pain in my hips is
excruciating. I was so weak I was shaking terribly and sweating profusely. It
was just awful!
Please pray that the Lord will grant me patience and wisdom on a continual
basis. I used to think I was a patient person. Please pray that the Lord
speaks to both Ryan and Avery and helps them deal with htis anger. Please pray
that I will never lose my temper and hurt them. I am terrifed at the feelings I
have during these rages. The therapist says a great deal of that is
transference....I am feeling their feelings for them or with them. I believe
that.I want to act just like them during these rages! Please pray for dear
sweet Emily as she gets so upset to see this happen and mom screaming in pain
and Ryan trying to get to the knives...The one good thing that comes of thiese
(there might be more than one good thing but I certainly can't think of anymore)
is that when Ryan throws one Avery sees how he looks throwing one and vice
versa. I think that gets their attention. Please pray that God gives me the
strength to be a firm loving parent, but not to try to enforce discipline
without Rob being home.
I am exhausted and in pain and feeling very very ill from the pain meds.
Emotionally I worn out. Rob is still having to work 10 hours days, so e also is
worn out physically and we can't give each other the support
we each need right now. There is no 'us' time...we cannot leave the boys with
anyone right now. With homeschooling them, they are with me all the time. Rob
takes them on weekends to do errands and yard work which is a help to me but
draining on him. These two boys have destroyed our family within the past year.
That may sound a tad melodramamtic but it is how I feel. I thought we were
doing right, and I still think we did. I think Satan jusst has a huge hold on
them and there is such spiritual warfare going on in our home constantly. Both
boys accepted Jesus in late Aug. or early Sept. and perhaps that is part of it
too.Satan and his minions wrecking havoc...please pray for all of us.
I found several verses I wanted to share regarding last week's question of 'why
hasn;'t God healed us' I will try to post them tomorrow. I am hoping that I
will have tomorrow to get a feww things done before the flare starts, as I know
it will. It is already starting, but shouldn't reach full force for another day
or so....if it follows the usual plan when I overdo it physically. I am very
discouraged at the moment because of the emotional fatigue and the intense pain
all over my body with percocet even. I appreciate your prayers, and also
knowing that I can share this with my sisters in Christ.
==
agape,
Christy
Proverbs 31:13 She seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands.
AIM user name: crochetin4Christ
MSN user name: ouchiemama
http://www.egroups.com/group/ThankYouJesusforThornsonMyRoses (elist for
Christian women living with chronic pain and illness
http://www.geocities.com/christybritain/
Christian pages, Matthew 25:40 Ministries,free craft and crochet patterns, FMS,
classic movies,recipes,homeschooling, aromatherapy, books, mysteries, etc. etc.
http://www.geocities.com/britainchristianacademy/indexofstudies.html (thematic
on-line unit studies with off-line activites and games grades 2-?)
websites are continual works in progress

I wanted to wish all of you a very Merry Christmas!!!
I'm doing better and finally am getting some of my energy back so I
wanted you all to know that I love you and hope that each and every
one of you has the best Christmas possible. We have all had some
really difficult times this year but we have also had things for
which we can be very grateful. I, for one, know that without the
support you guys gave me I would not have been able to stand strong
when I most needed to. Dori, you haven't said much about your surgery
and I've been waiting to hear about when that will be. There will
never be a time when I'm not here for you or anyone else in this
group. Lynn, I hope that you and yours are all healthy and happy and
your Christmas is the best! Lynda, I can hardly wait to see you
sometime around Christmas! Sandy, this Christmas may be difficult for
you. If you need to talk, call me sweetie, I'm here for you. Carrie,
I'm glad you are done with your surgeries and if this Christmas is
difficult for you, call me, I'm here for you also. Sherree, have a
great Christmas, Hon! Jan, Sherry, Karen have a wonderful Christmas
and please let us know how you are doing!
Love to All,
Betty

I've seen this poem before but Never like this! Enjoy! Love, Carrie

--
May The Lord Smile Upon You Today!! `;~)

Merry Christmas! Thought you might like this site.

http://www.deerlakemail.com/teach/

--- willisway@... wrote:
So that means my first post-op visit will
It was a month before I could have my first post-op
visit after my first stimulator. I live in Dallas and
the implant was done in Lubbock. After 2 months of
the nonsense of travelling back and forth, I was able
to get a physician in Dallas who would take me on.
Your internist (ot physician with whom you have the
best relationship) can be your best friend. Use him
or her when necessary.
I have to ask - do you live in northern KY? Both my
husband and I are natives of Ft. Thomas... perhaps it
really is a small world.
Anne in TX

'But I will restore you to health
and heal your wounds,' declares
The LORD, 'because you are called an
outcast'" Jeremiah 30:17
Does living with chronic illness and
pain have you feeling like an outcast?
Do you find yourself living life on
the outside, always looking in? There
may be events, such as country fairs,
going out to restaurants, socializing
with friends, things that most people
take for granted, that now, since your
diagnosis, you are no longer able to
enjoy.
Unfortunately, living with chronic
illness and/or pain has a way of
limiting and restricting our activities.
This open acknowledgment of our
limitations may set the mood for despair
and depression to set in. We long for
something we once had that now is gone.
How do you cope? What do you do to
manage the clouds of sadness and
depression
and the darkness of despair?
Friends and loved ones may have decided
to stop calling due to their own
feelings of their own helplessness. We
may hear responses, "If you just
stopped thinking about your troubles and
get over it, you would feel better."
Such responses are ignorant. There
is
an old Native American saying that
states, "Never judge a man until
you
have walked a mile in his moccasins."
No others may not be able to relate, but
there is One Whom can. God. "He was
despised and rejected by men, a Man
of
sorrows and familiar with suffering."
(Isaiah 53:3)
God understands what we face and wants
us to come to Him for help as little
lost sheep seeking their shepherd.
"For this is what the Sovereign LORD:
I Myself will search for my sheep and look
after them. As a shepherd looks after His
scattered sheep when he is with them, so
will I look after my sheep. I will rescue
them from all the places where they were
scattered on a day of clouds and darkness."
Ezekiel 34:11,12
God will rescue you from the places where
clouds of despair and darkness came over
you. He will heal your spirit
and your
soul, "I will bind up the injured and
strengthen the weak" Ezekiel 34:16
He will met your every need. Why? Because
He Loves You.
God's Blessings.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Kay,
devotional coordinator for Rest Ministries lives
with post-traumatic stress disorder, vulvodynia,
depression and panic disorder. Kay also lives with
her husband and her
sweet dog in Connecticut. As a
survivor of Hodgkin's Disease and other life traumas,
Kay has never lost sight that God is bigger than any
circumstance in her
life and gives Him all the glory.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
----parting words----
YES! We appreciate DONATIONS and they are
tax-deductible. If you're starting to think you
need more tax-deductions
for 2000, please remember us!
http://www.restministries.org/admin-donations.htm
Compliments of Rest Ministries, serving people
Who live with chronic illness
or pain.
Rest Ministries, Inc.
http://www.restministries.org
PO Box 502928,
San Diego, CA 92150
toll-free 1-888-751-REST (7378)
==
agape,
Christy
Proverbs 31:13 She seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands.
AIM user name: crochetin4Christ
MSN user name: ouchiemama
http://www.egroups.com/group/ThankYouJesusforThornsonMyRoses (elist for
Christian women living with chronic pain and illness
http://www.geocities.com/christybritain/
Christian pages, Matthew 25:40 Ministries,free craft and crochet patterns, FMS,
classic movies,recipes,homeschooling, aromatherapy, books, mysteries, etc. etc.
http://www.geocities.com/britainchristianacademy/indexofstudies.html (thematic
on-line unit studies with off-line activites and games grades 2-?)
websites are continual works in progress

I was scheduled to have my first post-op appointment 2 weeks after surgery.
But the assistant has been nothing but annoying and she gave me the wrong
information about how to get to the doctor's office (different one than my
pre-op).
We tried for an hour and a half to find it-and different receptionists would
look up the office in their little blue book of doctor's offices-send us
different places-and they would be wrong. It was a wild good chase! We tried
calling the office to get directions, even had a doctor's office try to call on
our
behalf, but all we got was voice mail-and they would not call back.
So, I missed the post-op AND I missed my session with Medtronics to do more
programming on the device and also to be trained to use the recharger.
I'm more than bummed!
But here is the worst part. The doctor's assistant called me at 6:45 p.m.
last night to reschedule, and the first available she could give me is next
Thursday. So that means my first post-op visit will be 24 days after my surgery.
Does that sound right? I even told her I had a couple of problems I wanted to
talk to the surgeon about, and she didn't ask what the problems were, or try to
get me in with anyone else sooner. I even said I would go to any location
available, since he works out of several offices.
I'm still having a lot of swelling and pain, and the area where they fished
the tubing under the skin is very tight and swollen and still bruised. I'm even
having pain on the nonsurgical side, just from overcompensating. I have a
connective tissue disease (Lupus, Scleroderma, Rheumatoid Arthritis, and
Sjogren's Syndrome all rolled up into one disease), so I know that makes me more
susceptible to soft tissue problems. I'm also having some chest problems that
feels
like lung problems-congestion-and I do have restrictive lung disease so this
is a concern. So I can't believe they didn't get me in sooner.
I guess I will call my internist tomorrow and see if she can squeeze me in. I
called Medtronics, and they can see me sooner if the doctor will give us a
room to meet in-they will work that out and call me back.
If you all have any thoughts about the symptoms, or about this doctor's
practice of seeing patients so late in the game of recovery, I'd like to hear
your
comments.
Thanks,
Kathy W. in KY (actually being treated in Cincinnati, OH)

hello everyone
please do not hit reply all to this message
I think I have mentioned my new charity to most of you...
called Matthew25:40 Ministries.we have several 'divisions' for those who feel
called in one direction or another.... new elist is to help us offer ideas and
patterns and support in our endeavor to provide for God's needy Children. You
can get to the URL thorugh the elist main page as well if you want more info.
I don't expect it to be a very chatty list as most of us will be working on
projects..but any information on your favorite charity is welcome as well as
patterns for our projects and questions and idea swapping
==
agape,
Christy
Proverbs 31:13 She seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands.
AIM user name: crochetin4Christ
MSN user name: ouchiemama
http://www.egroups.com/group/ThankYouJesusforThornsonMyRoses (elist for
Christian women living with chronic pain and illness
http://www.geocities.com/christybritain/
Christian pages, Matthew 25:40 Ministries,free craft and crochet patterns, FMS,
classic movies,recipes,homeschooling, aromatherapy, books, mysteries, etc. etc.
http://www.geocities.com/britainchristianacademy/indexofstudies.html (thematic
on-line unit studies with off-line activites and games grades 2-?)
websites are continual works in progress

Santa History
dont sing of yesterday, yesterday is gone ,tommorow isnt written, make today your song

Dear Christy...I have received and sent
this same one out to all of my friends
before...It is a powerful message, and I just may send it again. I am a
new member, and I have yet to introduce myself...I will do so in another
e-mail.
Hugs!
Barb

At Lynda's request,I have entered her mailing address to our database.
Lynn Scoville

*** There is an attachment in this mail. ***
==
agape,
Christy
Proverbs 31:13 She seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands.
AIM user name: crochetin4Christ
MSN user name: ouchiemama
http://www.egroups.com/group/ThankYouJesusforThornsonMyRoses (elist for
Christian women living with chronic pain and illness
http://www.geocities.com/christybritain/
Christian pages, Matthew 25:40 Ministries,free craft and crochet patterns, FMS,
classic movies,recipes,homeschooling, aromatherapy, books, mysteries, etc. etc.
http://www.geocities.com/britainchristianacademy/indexofstudies.html (thematic
on-line unit studies with off-line activites and games grades 2-?)
websites are continual works in progress

Christy,
Please be assured that Angie, Kelly, and the family will be in my prayers and
thoughts.
I know that Our Father will be there for her, as only He can. May she feel
His love.
Hugs,
Fran

J.C.
I have to same problem. Between the medicine that cause dry mouth
and the anti-seizure drugs that cause teeth problems I had tons of
teeth problems. I never used to have cavities now all the sudden my
teeth are horrible. Two years ago I went into the dentist and he
found 5 cavities I almost had a heart attack. Thats when I found out
about the dry mouth causing teeth problems but more importantly the
problems the anti-seizure drugs cause. I have been trying to brush
my teeth as often as possible and floss at least every day (if not
twice). I have also been using a fluoride rinse. All this helps but
I'm still having problems. I just recently started taking a new
medicine for my dry mouth which my dentist if hoping will help its
called Evoxac. It seems to be helping.
Don't feel bad about being blind-sided by this whole thing, I was
too. I had no idea any of this could happen either. I thought I
knew the side effects but I guess I didn't. Good luck with your
teeth, and know your not alone!
Jaci

hi all
sorry about cross posting but this is an urgent prayer request..please do not
hit reply all if you reply
My friend Angie just learned that her oldest daughter (who is only 18) has
cancer. Her daughter's name is Kelly. She is currently in a hospital in
Redding CA and she will be transferred to UC Davis later this week
She has a large tumour in her torso area that they are estimating is aobut 38
inches. They are not projecting a prognosis as of now, because they are not sure
if it is attached to the organs or if it penetrates them...Kelly is a toughie
and survived cancer 2 years ago after having all her reproductive organs
removed. They don't know if she will have chemo or surgery first...I will keep
you posted. She has decided to shave her head instead of waiting for it fall
out..her mom makes beautiful hats though!
Please pray for ministry opportunities as I do not believe that Kelly is saved,
and that Angie and her family will seek the Lord for comfort and guidance and
that this will all turn to be a blessing.
Also, for their finances, as Angie will be taking off from work to accompany her
daughter, and for the younger children as they watch their sister fight for her
life, and must be apart from their mom for awhile.
thanks so much for your prayers
==
agape,
Christy
Proverbs 31:13 She seeketh wool and flax and worketh willingly with her hands.
AIM user name: crochetin4Christ
MSN user name: ouchiemama
http://www.egroups.com/group/ThankYouJesusforThornsonMyRoses (elist for
Christian women living with chronic pain and illness
http://www.geocities.com/christybritain/
Christian pages, Matthew 25:40 Ministries,free craft and crochet patterns, FMS,
classic movies,recipes,homeschooling, aromatherapy, books, mysteries, etc. etc.
http://www.geocities.com/britainchristianacademy/indexofstudies.html (thematic
on-line unit studies with off-line activites and games grades 2-?)
websites are continual works in progress

Denise
I take topamax and Amitriptyline together and I don't have any
problems, that's not to say other people don't have problems taking
them together. I don't know if my idea as to why you are having
problems with your mouth has any merit to it, but I figured I would
put it out there. Amitriptyline is none to cause a dry mouth. Then
you have Neurontin and Topamax which are both anti-seizure drugs.
Anti-seizure drugs are known to cause horrible teeth problems. They
can cause dry mouthes, rotting of the teeth, cavities, etc. It is
very important when you are on these to go to the dentist regularly
and to floss and brush you teeth constantly. I was also told to use
a mouth wash with floride to help prevent dekay. My dentist also
recommended I try the over the counter mouth washes to help with the
dry mouth but none of the seemed to do much. Maybe since you are
still on a high dose of neurontin, on a pretty decent dose of
topamax, and on the amitriptyline all at the same time all of them
together are causing the problem. If you are having a problem with
dry mouth my ear, nose and throat doctor just recommended this new
medicine to me called Evoxac. I take 30mg 3 times a day and it works
great. My mouth hasn't been dry in weeks its wonderful. Anyway,
good luck I hope it all works out for you.
Jaci

Funny!!!

--
May The Lord Smile Upon You Today!! `;~)

Subject: The Detroit Lions

Q: What do you call 47 millionaires around a TV watching the Super Bowl?
A: The Detroit Lions.
Q: What do the Detroit Lions and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell "Jesus Christ."
Q: How do you keep a Detroit Lion out of your yard?
A: Put up goal posts.
Q: Where do you go in Detroit in case of a tornado?
A: To Ford Field - they never get a touchdown there.
Q: What do you call a Detroit Lion with a Super Bowl ring?
A: A thief.
Q: Why doesn't Grand Rapids have a professional football team?
A: Because then Detroit would want one.
Q: What's the difference between the Detroit Lions and a dollar bill?
A: You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
Q: How many Detroit Lions does it take to win a Super Bowl?
A: Nobody knows and we may never find out.
Q: What do the Detroit Lions and possums have in common?
A: Both play dead at home and get killed on the road.

THE CLASS REUNION....
I'd prepared for it like any intelligent woman would.
I went on a starvation diet the day before, knowing
that all the extra weight would just melt off in
24-hours, leaving me with my sleek, trim,
high-school-girl body. The many years of careful
cellulite collection would just be gone with a snap of
a finger. I knew that if I didn't eat a morsel on
Friday, I could fit into my senior formal on
Saturday.
Trotting up to the attic, I pulled the gown out of the
garment bag, carried it lovingly downstairs, ran my
hand over the fabric, and hung it on the door. I
stripped naked, looked in the mirror,and thought
"Well, okay, maybe if I shift it all to the back..."
Bodies never have pockets where you need them.
Bravely, I took the gown off the hanger, unzipped the
shimmering dress, stepping gingerly into it. I
struggled, twisted, turned, and pulled ... and I got
the formal all the way up to my knees before the
zipper
gave out. I was disappointed. I wanted to wear that
dress with those silver platform sandals again and
dance the night away. Okay, one setback was not going
to spoil my mood for this affair. No way!
Rolling the dress into a ball and tossing it into the
corner, I turned to Plan B. The black velvet caftan. I
gathered up all the goodies that I'd purchased at the
drug store; the scented shower gel; the body building
and highlighting shampoo & conditioner, and the
split-end killer and shine enhancer. Soon my hair
would look like that girl's in the Pantene ads. Then
the makeup - the under eye "ain't no lines here"
firming cream, the all day face-lifting, gravity
fighting moisturizer with wrinkle filler spackle; the
all day "kiss me till my lips bleed, and see if this
gloss will come off" lipstick, the bronzing face
powder for that special glow...but first, the roll-on
facial hair remover. I could feel the wrinkles
shuddering in fear.
OK - time to get ready...I jumped into the steaming
shower, soaped, lathered, rinsed, shaved, tweezed,
buffed, scrubbed, and scoured my body to a tingling
pink. I plastered my freshly scrubbed face with the
anti-wrinkle, gravity fighting, "your face will look
like a baby's butt" face cream. I set my hair on the
hot rollers. I felt wonderful. Ready to take on the
world. Or in this instance, . . .my underwear.
With the towel firmly wrapped around my glistening
body, I pulled out the black, lacy, tummy-tucking,
cellulite-pushing, hamhock-rounding girdle, and the
matching "lifting those bosoms like they're filled
with helium" bra. I greased my body with scented body
lotion and begin the plunge. I pulled, stretched,
tugged, hiked,folded, tucked, twisted, shimmied,
hopped, pushed, wiggled, snapped, shook, caterpillar
crawled, and kicked. Sweat poured off my forehead,
but I was done. And it didn't look bad. So, I
rested. A well deserved rest, too. The girdle was on
my body. Bounce a quarter off my behind? It was
tighter than a trampoline. Can you say, "Rubber baby
buggy bumper butt?" Okay, so I had to take baby
steps, and walk sideways, and I couldn't move from my
butt cheeks to my knees. But I was firm!
Oh no ... I had to go to the bathroom. And there
wasn't a snap crotch. From now on undies gotta have a
snap crotch. I was ready to rip it open and re-stitch
the crotch with Velcro. But the pain factor from
past experiments was still fresh in my mind. I quickly
side stepped to the bathroom. An hour later, I had
answered nature's call and repeated the struggle into
the girdle.
I was ready for the bra. I remembered what the
saleslady said to do. I could see her glossed lips
mouthing, "Do not fasten the bra in the front, and
twist it around---put the bra on the way it should be
worn - straps over the shoulders, bend over and gently
place both breasts inside the cups." Easy, if you
have four hands. But, with confidence, I put my arms
into the holsters, bent over and pulled the bra
down...
but the boobs were not cooperating. I'd no sooner tuck
one in a cup, and while placing the other, the first
would slip out. I needed a strategy. I bounced up &
down a few times, tried to dribble them in with short
bunny hops, but that didn't work. So while bent over,
I
began rocking gently back and forth on my heel and
toes and I set 'em to swinging. Finally, on the
fourth
swing, pause, and lift! I captured the gliding
glands. Quickly fastening the back of the bra I stood
up for an exam.
Back straight, slightly arched, I turned and faced the
mirror. I smiled. Yes, Houston, we have lift up! My
breasts were high, firm and there was cleavage! I was
happy until I tried to look down. I had a chinrest.
And I couldn't see my feet. I still had to put on my
pantyhose, and shoes. Why did I buy heels with
buckles? . . . And then I had to pee again.
Think I'll go eat a WHOLE cheescake and skip the %#$@!
reunion!!!

worth the read.
parents sat
across
heart and chest back
up
I'll find in
your
for cure.
Therapy:
paused, "death
within
You've put him
here;
him to an early
death.
was not meant for
your
and will forever
be.
will be comforted as
you
him here, and they
will
hotter. "You
created
dead in months.
Why?"
return to My flock,
for
with your flock to
lose
parents sat
across